Happy Anniversary

It's been 14 years since my husband and I made it official! I'm not talking about our wedding anniversary, but another important date. It was March 17th, 1996 when my hubby and I decided we would be together and we have been ever since. Even after all these years I can't imagine being with anyone else. I absolutely love Will with all my heart. I still look forward to him getting home from work every night. He is my best friend in this whole world! It may be hard to believe but he never complains, he is always willing to help around the house (often cleaning the entire house on his day off), does the grocery shopping, starts my car in the winter and is the BEST dad any kid could ask for. He's loving, caring and never selfish. I'm probably the luckiest girl on this planet. Happy 14 years, baby!

Yo!

Will and I had our first ultrasound on Thursday. I was so nervous I was shaking. Will did a good job trying to keep me calm. The staff seems to get a kick out of Will every time he comes to visit... Mr. Personality!

I knew since I was only about 8 weeks along that I would get to be more acquainted with the "hoo-ha wand". Which means a vaginal ultrasound. Yay me! I forgot to mention this to Will. Even after I removed my pants, he never thought to ask why I was getting undressed. Will positioned himself at the bottom of the table and he sat in the chair. There were two monitors in the room. One for the patient to view and one for the Dr. I told Will that I wanted him to sit next to me and he said he would move to that chair when they came back. Well, Dr. H and Nurse J returned and asked me scoot my butt down to the edge of the table. I gave Will the stink eye, but he still didn't budge from his prime seating. Finally I yelled at him, "I want you over here!" I giggled and explained that I know we've been married for over 9 years, but I wasn't comfortable with him looking straight up my va-jay-jay while the Dr. molested me with the happy stick. Everyone seemed to get a kick out of this. It wasn't until this point did Will realize what type of ultrasound I was really having that day.

Dr. H seemed very pleased with Pumpkin's size. The heartbeat was 150 and we even got to hear the lovely swish swish sound. It was music to my ears. Of course I cried tears of joy and hope, but they were still tainted with fear. Will kept asking the Dr if she only saw one (she did). And he seemed to get a big kick out of the Dr referring to the yolk sac. So he keeps referring to the baby as "Yo" now. We will return in 2 weeks to check the growth of the baby and determine a due date based on the baby's size. Then I may have one more ultrasound before I'm released to my OBGYN (who I haven't even found yet!)

Pregnancy Quiz

I feel like I have to guard myself in case the worst happens, but on the other hand I don't want to remember my pregnancy as being a miserable and stressful 9 months. I have to remind myself (sometimes several times a day) "Worrying will not change the outcome". I religiously check the toilet paper for blood each time I wipe. I panic with every twinge of pain. I can't even tell you the last time my hubby and I have done the deed, for fear it will cause a miscarriage (poor hubby). I know it's silly, but I just lost a baby a few months ago! The pain is still fresh in my mind. I pray to God everyday that he will not allow that to ever happen to me again!

I feel like I am testing my luck by getting so excited about this baby growing inside of me, but I saw this quiz on another blog so I wanted to give it a try.

How far along: 7 weeks today

Who knows: You do! We haven't made an official announcement, but we plan to after next week's ultrasound. My mom and BFF know and a few of my ex coworkers. I'm not very good at secrets.

Symptoms: Nausea (more so when I allow myself to get hungry) and headaches. The same symptoms as my previous pregnancies sans the tender/ sore breasts.


Total weight gain: I haven't weighed myself and I don't want to right now since I didn't lose all the weight from my previous pregnancy!

Maternity clothes: I'm not wearing any maternity clothes yet, but I did buy some shirts recently from Old Navy.

Stretch marks: Nothing new!

Sleep: By 9 o'clock I can barely keep my eyes open, but my previous 2 pregnancies I was much more tired. I'm wondering if it just hasn't hit yet.

Best moment last week: I don't think there was any. I started a new position at work, so I have lots of training classes, applications to learn and coworkers to get to know. My grandma passed away and my friend had brain surgery. But if I had to pick something, I would say Olivia deciding (for herself) that she will go on the potty now. All the candy, stickers and bribes didn't work. She just started going on the toilet and has been going since Wednesday. Ha!

Movement: The baby is the size of a blueberry, but I have those feelings like a butterfly is tickling my insides.

Food cravings: Varies, but I've been thinking about fresh fruit lately!

Belly Button in or out: IN!

What I miss: Cappuccino and Coke (I'm trying to not drink any caffeine)

What I am looking forward to: My ultrasound March 11th!

Milestones: Hoping to hear the heartbeat next week.

How is daddy? He is so excited about the baby and is looking forward to the ultrasound next week. Although he is usually guarded and doesn't allow himself to get too excited about things, I can tell he is hopeful that this pregnancy will go as planned. He's already planning and figuring things out.

Abuela's Gift

My Abuela died in her home in Puerto Rico on Monday, February 15th. I didn't receive the news until Tuesday, the day my pregnancy was confirmed by Dr. H. She was 99, so it wasn't a complete shock. I can't help but think of the Circle of Life (can't you just hear the Lion King song now).

Since my initial visit to the RE my Beta numbers have increased nicely. However my third blood draw indicated that my progesterone had dipped a little. My Dr considered my progesterone "borderline" and immediately put me on a progesterone supplement. Of course it must be a vaginal supplement because nothing that has to do with pregnancy can be easy for me.

Since my Dr routinely schedules only 3 Beta checks, every other day, I haven't had an opportunity to have my levels checked in over a week. As much as I HATE needles, I appreciated those updates for reassurance that everything is going well. That's why I welcomed my first bout of nausea. I know it seems crazy, but once I got that familiar nauseous feeling and slight headache I welcomed it, knowing that it meant this wasn't all in my head. This little bean inside of me is growing! And right now, we are referring to this little baby as, "Pumpkin" due to the EDD being in October. We are looking forward to our first scheduled ultrasound, Thursday March 11th!

V Day!

I had a huge surprise today when I took a home pregnancy test on a whim! I didn't take the test because I felt pregnant or even thought that was a possibility. I took the test because my period was late and I knew the Dr would request I take one or two before prescribing Provera to bring on another cycle. We were scheduled to begin Clomid/ IUI cycle this month and I was getting antsy for the process to start. So you can imagine my shock when I got two blue lines on my pregnancy test. I was in disbelief. I wasn't going to mention it to Will, because I thought it had to be wrong. Then the other test from the pack was a dud. So I knew it had to be a mistake. I debated back and forth through the evening on whether or not to run out and buy another pack of tests. It didn't take much convincing before I headed out into the chilly night to grab another pack of tests.

3 tests and 1 blood draw later, it's been confirmed! So far the stats are as follows:

What is the HCG level? 104
What is the Progesterone level? 12.1
How far along am I? 5 weeks
What is my due date? October 22nd, 2010

I go back to the Dr this Thursday to repeat the blood draw. Hopefully we will see my beat numbers go waaaaaaaay up!

Clomid+HCG+IUI

Zzzzzz. I've been suffering from insomnia lately. I haven't been able to pinpoint the root cause of my sleepless nights, but I'm hoping to get a full 7 hours sleep soon. So please be patient with any ramblings in this blog!

I had my follow up appointment with my RE, Dr. H on Thursday (sans dear hubby). Will was instructed to drop Olivia off at daycare and meet me at the Dr's office, but somewhere between home and the Falls, he forgot where his final destination should be, so he went to work instead. Anyone who knows my husband would not be surprised by this.

Our next course of treatment will be 100 mg of Clomid, HCG trigger shot and IUI. For all my fertile blog readers out there, IUI is basically artificial insemenation (Will's boys of course). The Clomid is taken prior to the IUI to help induce ovulation and the HCG trigger shot is to help mature my eggs. Since the IUI is painless and not much different from a regular pap, I'm most concerned about the trigger shot. Especially since I will have to rely on Will to do the deed. This is the man that was balled into the fetal position while I was getting poked, over and over, for my IV. Apparently I have "little" veins and they "roll"! Besides, something just doesn't seem right about giving a woman drugs that cause MAJOR mood swings, then arming dear husband with a needle.

This is all supposed to start our next cycle, which should be sometime after V-Day! Besides the hefty price tag of $1,500 I'm really excited about this next step of our journey. The amount of money will be well worth it if it works out for us! Wish us luck!!

HSG

Today I had my HSG and my uterus shape looks good and my tubes are all clear. A HSG is a test where dye is inserted through a catheter into the uterus to view the shape of the uterus and make sure that the fallopian tubes are not blocked.

Now, can you picture me in a hospital gown that could barely cover Paris Hilton, with my tush hanging out the back and socks and tennis shoes on? It was quite a site! Why wouldn't I feel uncomfortable. Then I had to lay down on the cold, hard xray table with my vajayjay airing out in the open in front of the Radiology Techs, my Dr and the Radiologist. I don't know what I was more afraid of, the pain or losing my dignity. I guess during that moment I was more afraid of the pain because I lost my dignity between the births of my children! I'm happy to say I have no blockages and it wasn't nearly as painful as I had expected.

What's next? Dr. H. wants Will to have another sperm analysis since his last one was from a year ago. Will isn't too thrilled about this request. That's just too bad though. I've been filled with gut-wrenching meds, poked and prodded and all Will has to do is make love to a cup. I'm sure he will survive.